Art of Love
- 1.365.401
For her good word goes far in love affairs.
- 1.365.402
The time and fit occasion leave to her,
- 1.365.403
When she most amply can thy suit prefer.
- 1.365.404
The time for maids to fire their lady's blood
- 1.365.405
Is when they find her in a merry mood.
- 1.365.406
When all things at her wish and pleasure move;
- 1.365.407
Her heart is open then, and free to love.
- 1.365.408
Then mirth and wantonness to lust betray,
- 1.365.409
And smooth the passage to the lover's way.
- 1.365.410
Troy stood the siege, when fill'd with anxious care
- 1.365.411
One merry fit concluded all the war.
- 1.365.412
If some fair rival vex her jealous mind,
- 1.365.413
Offer thy service to revenge in kind.
- 1.365.414
Instruct the damsel, while she combs her hair,
- 1.365.415
To raise the choler of that injur'd fair;
- 1.365.416
And sighing, make her mistress understand
- 1.365.417
She has the means of vengeance in her hand.
- 1.365.418
Then, naming thee, thy humble suit prefer;
- 1.365.419
And swear thou languishest and diest for her.
- 1.365.420
Then let her lose no time, but push at all;
- 1.365.421
For women soon are rais'd, and soon they fall.
- 1.365.422
Give their first fury leisure to relent,
- 1.365.423
They melt like ice, and suddenly repent.
- 1.365.424
T' enjoy the maid, will that thy suit advance?
- 1.365.425
'Tis a hard question, and a doubtful chance.
- 1.365.426
One maid corrupted, bawds the better for't;
- 1.365.427
Another for herself would keep the sport.
- 1.365.428
Thy bus'ness may be furthered or delay'd,
- 1.365.429
But by my counsel, let alone the maid
- 1.365.430
E'en tho' she should consent to do the feat;
- 1.365.431
The profit's little, and the danger great.
- 1.365.432
I will not lead thee through a rugged road,
- 1.365.433
But where the way lies open, safe and broad,
- 1.365.434
Yet if thou find'st her very much thy friend,
- 1.365.435
And her good face her diligence commend,
- 1.365.436
Let the fair mistress have the first embrace,
- 1.365.437
And let the maid come after in her place.
- 1.365.438
But this I will advise, and mark my words,
- 1.365.439
For 'tis the best advice my skill affords;
- 1.365.440
If needs thou with the damsel wilt begin,
- 1.365.441
Before th' attempt is made, make sure to win;
- 1.365.442
For then the secret better will be kept,
- 1.365.443
And she can tell no tales when once she's dipt.
- 1.365.444
'Tis for the fowler's int'rest to beware,
- 1.365.445
The bird intangled, should not 'scape the snare.
- 1.365.446
The fish once prick'd avoids the bearded hook,
- 1.365.447
And spoils the sport of all the neighb'ring brook.
- 1.365.448
But if the wench be thine, she makes thy way,
- 1.365.449
And for thy sake, her mistress will betray;
- 1.365.450
Tell all she knows, and all she hears her say
- 1.365.451
Keep well the counsel of thy faithful spy;
- 1.365.452
So shalt thou learn whene'er she treads awry.
- 1.399.453
All things the stations of their seasons keep;
- 1.399.454
And certain times there are to sow and reap.
- 1.399.455
Ploughmen and sailors for the season stay,
- 1.399.456
One to plough land, and one to plough the sea;
- 1.399.457
So should the lover wait the lucky day.
- 1.399.458
Then stop thy suit, it hurts not thy design;
- 1.399.459
But think another hour she may be thine.
- 1.399.460
And when she celebrates her birth at home,
- 1.399.461
Or when she views the public shows of Rome;
- 1.399.462
Know all thy visits then are troublesome.
- 1.399.463
Defer thy work, and put not then to sea,
- 1.399.464
For that's a boding and a stormy day.
- 1.399.465
Else take thy time, and when thou canst, begin;
- 1.399.466
To break a Jewish sabbath, think no sin;
- 1.399.467
Nor e'en on superstitious days abstain;
- 1.399.468
Nor when the Romans were at Allia slain.
- 1.399.469
Ill omens in her frowns are understood;
- 1.399.470
When she's in humour, ev'ry day is good.
- 1.399.471
But than her birthday seldom comes a worse,
- 1.399.472
When bribes and presents must be sent of course;
- 1.399.473
And that's a bloody day that costs thy purse.
- 1.399.474
Be stanch; yet parsimony will be vain:
- 1.399.475
The craving sex will still the lover drain.
- 1.399.476
No skill can shift them off, nor art remove;
- 1.399.477
They will be begging when they know we love.
- 1.399.478
The merchant comes upon th' appointed day,
- 1.399.479
Who shall before thy face his wares display.
- 1.399.480
To choose for her she craves thy kind advice,
- 1.399.481
Then begs again to bargain for the price;
- 1.399.482
But when she has her purchase in her eye,
- 1.399.483
She hugs thee close, and kisses thee to buy;
- 1.399.484
"'Tis what I want, and 'tis a pen'orth too;
- 1.399.485
In many years I will not trouble you."
- 1.399.486
If you complain you have no ready coin,-
- 1.399.487
No matter, 'tis but writing of a line;
- 1.399.488
A little bill, not to be paid at sight:
- 1.399.489
(Now curse the time when thou wert taught to write.)
- 1.399.490
She keeps her birthday; you must send the cheer:
- 1.399.491
And she'll be born a hundred times a year.
- 1.399.492
With daily lies she dribs thee into cost;
- 1.399.493
That ear-ring dropt a stone, that ring is lost.
- 1.399.494
They often borrow what they never pay;
- 1.399.495
What e'er you lend her, think it thrown away.
- 1.399.496
Had I ten mouths and tongues to tell each art,
- 1.399.497
All would be wearied ere I told a part.
- 1.437.498
By letters, not by words, thy love begin;
- 1.437.499
And ford the dangerous passage with thy pen;
- 1.437.500
If to her heart thou aim'st to find the way,
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